What is Tantric sex and what exactly are the benefits of practicing Tantric sex?
In this week's Tantra Talk Series Melanie and ScottieO dive into these questions and discuss how they practice Tantra. From mindfulness to simple techniques to add into your sex life, learn with Ecstatic Hearts the advantages of practicing Tantric sex.
What is Tantric Sex?
Tantric sex is the magic that happens when you combine practicing Tantra and making love together. Tantra is a practice of weaving all of who you are together to be a whole complete being. The practice utilizes your sexual energy to reach higher states of consciousness. Tantra Yoga helps us to awaken Kundalini energy in your body. It helps to heighten all your senses. It helps us to become present and mindful. It’s a practice of living in love. Sex is but one aspect of Tantra. For myself, I also think it is the best aspect!
Tantric sex is slow sex. “Traditional sex” tends to be fast, friction focused and goal oriented. People are obsessed about getting to the orgasm. Then the orgasm is a localized event that lasts only a second leaving you feeling tired and used up at the end, resulting in sleep for many. By contrast Tantric sex is slow, with no goals, where you sink into feeling the full pleasure of the experience along the way. The foreplay is drawn out, the intercourse is drawn out and the afterplay is drawn out. Everything becomes a sensual loving experience. It often feels completely magical!!!
Tantrics often begin their Tantra practice by first clearing themselves of their blocks to bliss, their past wounds, traumas, fears, shame and guilt. Releasing these emotions from their bodies, they are able to be more present and relaxed in their bodies and more open to letting pleasure and love flow. This is usually done in a workshop setting or through private practice guided by a skilled Dakini or Tantrica. Tantric sex occurs best when all participants are able to be fully present and relaxed in the experience.
Tantric sex is love making. Sex is seen to be the highest expression of eros love. And the term sex becomes very expansive. Tantrics may find they can feel the soul of their partner and they can come together in a dance of souls in love. Tantrics often see the Divine in their partner especially when engaging in love making. Tantra is a practice of coming from love in everything you do. Tantra is opening ever deeper in love. Many Tantrics find they can open up to Divine love that is all around. When they make love they feel the love pouring in from all around and filling both them and their lover up.
Tantric Sex includes orgasms in a multitude of ways you never knew were possible. And orgasms come most easily when one lets go of the goal to have them and just relax into the pleasure, and experience whatever comes. You can actually orgasms all over your body in all kinds of ways!!! And the orgasms can go on and on and on. Being multiorgasmic is common for male and female Tantricas. As people get activated in their Tantric energy, they are able to have hands free energetic orgasms. These orgasmic experiences are high frequency extremely pleasurable vibrations that can occur all over the body. Sex or touch is not even necessary to experience these energy orgasms. You may even experience hands free orgasms on your own without any partner involved. When you learn how to combine the energetic orgasmic experience with the touch of sex, things get really amazing!
Tantric sex is an amazing out of this world experience when two people come together with love. They are fully present enjoying fully every moment without trying to reach a goal. It often includes energetic orgasms where both parties may become multi-orgasmic without expending all their energy with a climax. It is slow, sensual and present.
So how do I get started?
Try these Tantric Sex Tips out today!
Take things slow. Enjoy 30 minutes of teasing and pleasing the whole body including erogenous zones outside of the sex. Then enjoy 30 minutes of pleasing the genitals with massage and oral pleasure. Take things slow and massage from the outside inward waiting for the woman to be ready for each escalation. Stay in communication and ask if she is ready for you to massage her clit before touching her there. Wait for the woman to fully become engorged and to open her flower fully. It’s really important to not rush this phase and to make sure the woman is begging you to enter before continuing. Finally when both people are ready to continue into intercourse stretch that out slowly for 30 minutes or more if you can. Maybe pause when things get really exciting and hold, breathing the energy up the body allowing your pleasure to follow your breathe for full body energetic orgasms. Many women need intercourse to last for 30-45 minutes before they can orgasm from it. And don’t make yourself wrong if takes some practice to build this skill. More extensive Tantra training can help you to achieve mastery in this realm.
Making sounds of pleasure stimulates your body and your partner’s body to receiving more pleasure. It also helps to keep you both in sync. Open up to making moans of pleasure and ecstasy all along the ways. Breathe in deeply then let it out slowly with sound allowing your body to let out whatever sound wants to escape without any judgement of you sounding funny or being too loud. If you can both get in sync with your breathing and making sounds together, you will feed off each other and things will get juicier and juicier. Be sure to let out a good orgasmic scream or moan when you reach climax. And when your breathe runs out, take in another deep breathe and keep moaning. As long as you are making sound, the orgasm will continue to move through your body. This is one of the quickest ways to lengthen and intensify your orgasms.
Sustained Present Focused Attention
The biggest gift you can give to your partner is giving them your full undivided present attention. Come into a still mind to be fully present, then give your partner sustained focused present attention. This is amazing in sex and allows you to take note of your partner’s body cues and what is working and what is not working so well. It allows you to sync into deep connection and love with them and it allows you to tune into their frequency so you are on the same wavelength. Developing this skill can take time and a regular Tantra Yoga practice can really help with being able to be clear and present for you partner. Any time you notice yourself drifting off to something else, bring your attention and awareness back to your partner and what you are doing. The great thing about sustained present focused attention is that it is a skill that works well in any situation. Use this with you partner any time you are spending quality time together and you are sure to have a happy healthy relationship that lasts!